“There is a face that we hide,
Till the night time appears,
And what’s hiding inside,
Behind all of our fears,
Is our true self
Locked inside the façade!”
-- Jekyll and Hyde
Life is a never ending masquerade. Everyday, when we wake up, we pick out a mask in our closets, one that will hide our true selves from everyone. We go out and play our role, as if in a charade. People are trying to figure out if this is our true self, or if it is just the mask that we wear.
We do this same routine everyday and once the mask cracks or breaks, we go back to our closets and pick out a new one. We are afraid of what people would think if they found our true face, the one hidden behind the mask that we diligently put on day after day and take off every night before bed.
We begin to wonder… “Can they see through these layers of masks that I wear?” “Did they see my true self?” Then we begin to tell ourselves that we need to try harder, to be what people want us to be. We also put a wall between our friendships (relationships).
Our friends begin to feel untrusted or unhelpful. They begin to feel that they are not enough, that we want them to be something more; something more real to us. So, on go more masks and charades, trying to impress the world.
Soon we are worried that our friends are changing and falling away, we discover more masks and put those on. Our friends may be changing or falling away because they no longer feel that they know us or that we don’t need them anymore; we have found a new way to make it in the world. Right, like we can make it this way. They feel used and cheap; unwanted and unloved. No wonder they’d leave.
(**Not everyone wears a mask so this may not apply to you.**)
Oh yeah, I've decided (in light of this topic) that for my 18th birthday (which is still quite a ways away) that I'm going to through a masquerade ball/party type thing... It'll be interesting and fun. So start looking for masks or making them and stuff. Love you all!
Tiff
Tuesday, October 24, 2006
Monday, October 23, 2006
Reflections of Character
Everywhere you look
There is deceit and lies; seduction.
Seduction of the soul,
The mind,
The body.
Our individuality disappearing,
Self image fading in the mirror.
Can you see yourself…?
People tell other people;
This is the cool thing to do,
Everyone is doing it.
Why shouldn’t you?
Go ahead and tell…
Tell that person that you love them
Then walk away
Pulling their heart along the ground.
Go ahead and say…
Say that she should follow…
Follow you and your bad example.
Follow that person there
Or perhaps this one.
Follow this religion here.
Come follow this man
The man with all the answers.
Why not…?
Why not be that pretty or strong?
Why not have a boyfriend? Girlfriend?
Why not be that person?
The popular one?
The skinny one?
The smart one?
The one who has all the fun?
Finally…
Finally you no longer see yourself
Just a blur…
Who are you? What are you?
Who do you live for?
Those people there
Or the one you see right here,
In the mirror…?
By Tiffany Kennedy
There is deceit and lies; seduction.
Seduction of the soul,
The mind,
The body.
Our individuality disappearing,
Self image fading in the mirror.
Can you see yourself…?
People tell other people;
This is the cool thing to do,
Everyone is doing it.
Why shouldn’t you?
Go ahead and tell…
Tell that person that you love them
Then walk away
Pulling their heart along the ground.
Go ahead and say…
Say that she should follow…
Follow you and your bad example.
Follow that person there
Or perhaps this one.
Follow this religion here.
Come follow this man
The man with all the answers.
Why not…?
Why not be that pretty or strong?
Why not have a boyfriend? Girlfriend?
Why not be that person?
The popular one?
The skinny one?
The smart one?
The one who has all the fun?
Finally…
Finally you no longer see yourself
Just a blur…
Who are you? What are you?
Who do you live for?
Those people there
Or the one you see right here,
In the mirror…?
By Tiffany Kennedy
Wednesday, October 18, 2006
Corruption of Mind
"...Since the fall, good and evil has tried to control our lives. We cannot find our identity by the things we do or by the knowledge of things and people. As their identity was based on the knowledge of good and evil, their behavior was in opposition to their created purpose.
...As we judge our circumstances through the self-knowledge we acquired of good and evil, it will keep us away from the presence of God. Flesh fights the Spirit and our mind and conscience becomes the judge instead of God. Our behavior is a reaction to protect our sinful conscience.
Did you never wonder why Jesus repeatedly told us not to judge but to have mercy and forgiveness so that we are not guided by our knowledge of good and evil? Instead, he said, put on the mind of God, which is full of mercy and forgiveness because that is the Kingdom thinking we had before the fall.
...Many times we try to obtain the kingdom with our fleshly efforts of obeying rules never realizing that God is speaking about awakening of the spirit man. The spirit man does not live by the awareness of rules and laws. He lives by keeping alive his desire for God and by having communion with God. The spirit man seeks the law and order of the Spirit, which is not the same as the law, and traditions of man. We need to find a key to awaken the inner man who is asleep or dead due to the effects of the knowledge of good and evil. What is this key to awaken the inner man?
(Matthew 5:6) Righteousness is the key to opening and restoring the life of the inner man. It means to be upright, to be just, fair-minded and having a clear conscience. (Philippians 1:11) To be filled with the fruits of righteousness, means to have the fruits of the Spirit within our minds.
...How do we put on the mind of Christ?
We have to start with a clear conscience before God. To have a clear conscience is to be rid of unconfessed sin and the effects of sin. If we are not rid of the effects of our sin, we will not be able to give God the freedom to move through us. We will still act guilty and our behavior will be a reaction to justify our guiltiness... The person you may have been in the past through sinful actions still causes you guilt and shame. Jesus wants us to be absolutely free from the remembrance of our past lives. If these effects are not washed from our minds, we will carry these tainted thoughts of ourselves into our ministry and relationships with others. We will not be able to be righteous and fair-minded because our judgements will reflect our self-condemnation, guilt, self-hate, anger and criticism. If we have the mind of Christ, our ability to judge will not be the center of our lives, but our center will be the Father, Himself, who imparts into us a new understanding, to understand as He does, frees our conscience through the Blood of Christ.
(Philippians 2:5) Jesus had only one desire and that was to fulfill the Father’s will for his life. He retained the knowledge of the will of the Father in His mind. It was always present before Him. This is the new understanding. Because of the constant awareness of the Father’s will, he could accomplish His purpose in life without regard for His personal suffering.
In the assessment of good and evil, we will not have this all present awareness and knowledge of God. It is because we do not retain the present knowledge of God’s will that our minds become reprobate. This knowledge is the experience of God’s love for us. Without it, self-love dominates our lives.
Reprobate means to make morality bad or crooked. This reprobate mind causes us to turn from our original purpose of creation to yield to the destroyer. We put into action the evil that our mind conceives. This reprobate mind will make a soul desolate as the light of revelation, which gives the soul life, is completely refused. The reprobate mind lives for self-gratification.
By seeking the Kingdom first, we redirect our minds to Christ. This redirection of our mind to be like the mind of Christ, channels our emotions to develop in the fruits of the Spirit. We identify ourselves with Christ’s love to fulfill the Father’s will to restore all men to Himself. We will not identify ourselves by our needs and pleasure, but by His will and pleasure."
-Sigi
...As we judge our circumstances through the self-knowledge we acquired of good and evil, it will keep us away from the presence of God. Flesh fights the Spirit and our mind and conscience becomes the judge instead of God. Our behavior is a reaction to protect our sinful conscience.
Did you never wonder why Jesus repeatedly told us not to judge but to have mercy and forgiveness so that we are not guided by our knowledge of good and evil? Instead, he said, put on the mind of God, which is full of mercy and forgiveness because that is the Kingdom thinking we had before the fall.
...Many times we try to obtain the kingdom with our fleshly efforts of obeying rules never realizing that God is speaking about awakening of the spirit man. The spirit man does not live by the awareness of rules and laws. He lives by keeping alive his desire for God and by having communion with God. The spirit man seeks the law and order of the Spirit, which is not the same as the law, and traditions of man. We need to find a key to awaken the inner man who is asleep or dead due to the effects of the knowledge of good and evil. What is this key to awaken the inner man?
(Matthew 5:6) Righteousness is the key to opening and restoring the life of the inner man. It means to be upright, to be just, fair-minded and having a clear conscience. (Philippians 1:11) To be filled with the fruits of righteousness, means to have the fruits of the Spirit within our minds.
...How do we put on the mind of Christ?
We have to start with a clear conscience before God. To have a clear conscience is to be rid of unconfessed sin and the effects of sin. If we are not rid of the effects of our sin, we will not be able to give God the freedom to move through us. We will still act guilty and our behavior will be a reaction to justify our guiltiness... The person you may have been in the past through sinful actions still causes you guilt and shame. Jesus wants us to be absolutely free from the remembrance of our past lives. If these effects are not washed from our minds, we will carry these tainted thoughts of ourselves into our ministry and relationships with others. We will not be able to be righteous and fair-minded because our judgements will reflect our self-condemnation, guilt, self-hate, anger and criticism. If we have the mind of Christ, our ability to judge will not be the center of our lives, but our center will be the Father, Himself, who imparts into us a new understanding, to understand as He does, frees our conscience through the Blood of Christ.
(Philippians 2:5) Jesus had only one desire and that was to fulfill the Father’s will for his life. He retained the knowledge of the will of the Father in His mind. It was always present before Him. This is the new understanding. Because of the constant awareness of the Father’s will, he could accomplish His purpose in life without regard for His personal suffering.
In the assessment of good and evil, we will not have this all present awareness and knowledge of God. It is because we do not retain the present knowledge of God’s will that our minds become reprobate. This knowledge is the experience of God’s love for us. Without it, self-love dominates our lives.
Reprobate means to make morality bad or crooked. This reprobate mind causes us to turn from our original purpose of creation to yield to the destroyer. We put into action the evil that our mind conceives. This reprobate mind will make a soul desolate as the light of revelation, which gives the soul life, is completely refused. The reprobate mind lives for self-gratification.
By seeking the Kingdom first, we redirect our minds to Christ. This redirection of our mind to be like the mind of Christ, channels our emotions to develop in the fruits of the Spirit. We identify ourselves with Christ’s love to fulfill the Father’s will to restore all men to Himself. We will not identify ourselves by our needs and pleasure, but by His will and pleasure."
-Sigi
Thursday, October 12, 2006
In Memory of Shantelle
So I just heard about Shantelle... I really sucks that this had to happen just when she was cured of her cancer! Everything seemed to be going fine! Why, then, would she have an anuerism and die? Could God be trying to tell us all something; that she had put her trust completely in him and he had heard her prayers for help... and now that the message that he does answer prayers he has to show that it is time for everything? A time to live and a time to die... At first I was like, NO, SHANTELLE HAS SO MUCH LIFE, THIS HASN'T HAPPENED TO HER! Then I read her blog and was like, IT'S TRUE... SHE HAS FINALLY GONE HOME TO HER LORD AND SAVIOUR. Shantelle was such a humble person, she always had a kind word to say to you whenever she saw you. You could see her passion for Christ in everything that she did and said. She was a loving mother and wife, she never said any about her family that was bad, she always pointed out the good in them both. She also pointed out the good in life too, even if she had cancer; she was going to do everything in her power to tell the world about God's love and Jesus' sacrifice and compassion for us! In her personality there was charisma and enthusiasm for life and making the most of it, doing all she could do to bring her testimony to the people around her. Her life was that of dedication to God, her family, friends, those of us at camp... It was to everyone that would listen to her message, to her words of wisdom, love, compassion, and peace. When asked about how she felt about having cancer Shantelle's response was this, "I'm living with it; and I'm trusting God, that he will do what he wants done, not what I want. He will do great things with my life, my story..." This was a lady of the Spirit, someone who fully believed in her faith and clung to God as her life-raft. Shantelle was honest; honesty was one reason why I looked up to her. Her honest was true, pure, and simple. She never lacked humility, she would often do whatever she could for you if she knew that you needed the help, even if you didn't. She shared her story this summer with children and youth, sharing her complete faith and love of God. Many times she would come to our devotions and share with us what she thought about dating, marriage, love, anything that our minds would wonder to during our short times together with our cabins and during Grill 'em sessions.
We shared jokes and laughter, played games, shared memories of our lives... She will be sadly missed, but I would like to think of it this way...
- she is no longer suffering in this worlds turmoil
- she is with her Saviour
- she is watching us now
- her laughter is filling heaven with melodies of joy
- we will see her again soon and we will celebrate in heaven together in eternal life and worship God face to face together
We will remember her forever in our hearts and we will forever be reminded of her story, of her faith, of her passion... We will be praying for you Jo, Mikhayla, and family.
We shared jokes and laughter, played games, shared memories of our lives... She will be sadly missed, but I would like to think of it this way...
- she is no longer suffering in this worlds turmoil
- she is with her Saviour
- she is watching us now
- her laughter is filling heaven with melodies of joy
- we will see her again soon and we will celebrate in heaven together in eternal life and worship God face to face together
We will remember her forever in our hearts and we will forever be reminded of her story, of her faith, of her passion... We will be praying for you Jo, Mikhayla, and family.
Wednesday, October 04, 2006
My Testimony
I thought that I would just add this little bit of info on myself, though most of you know about it already...
A few years ago, the summer of 2002, I was baptized at Bethel Gospel Camp during our churches Family Camp's. Being raised in a Christian home, I had no major problems, I hung out with my Christian friends, some of which are still really good friends with me, and there has been new additions along the way (not all of them Christian). I enjoyed going to Sunday school and I still do, and I have been going to camp since Teddy Bear (six or seven years old). Though I have slipped now and then in my faith, like many others, I have always had someone there that I could look to for help, to answer my many questions and to give me guidance, sometimes just by watching them practice their faith in everyday life. The past three years, since I was baptized, have been hard but I have been sticking with my faith by the help of all the people here and others from the church family.
Two summers after I was baptized I decided that I wanted to work here at camp with kids, so I took the CIT (Counsellors In Training) course (now called LITE (Leaders In Training and Evangelism)), and went hiking through the bush for three days with no accessories for cleaning. It was an amazing experience and continued to be so last year, when I was a Junior Counselor or JC.
Those of you who CITed with me will know that I had this problem with worrying, I worried a lot about someone in my family dying of cancer. When I was twelve my dad had gotten a form of cancer, the doctors had caught it in time though and in just a few months he was back home going in for scheduled check-ups for many years. I was worried and afraid that either the cancer would come back either, to dad or anyone else in my family, and that the doctors wouldn't catch it in time. One night while I was walking around outside thinking about this I went to Lindsay (my sister, second oldest) and told her my worries and fears. She just said these few words " Stop worrying, and start trusting that God will protect us, and if you start to worry again I want you to say this verse over and over again; 1 Peter 5:7 "Cast all your anxieties on Him because He cares for you." That helped me every time I started to worry about anything I would say it over and over again until I stopped worrying (I still do that).
After a few years past I had hardly ever thought about cancer coming back until this past spring when my dad once again fell victim to it, this time it was acute leukemia, one of the worst kinds, the doctors caught it in time but said it would take heavy chemo to cure dad. He went through his week of treatments, just fine nothing went horribly wrong until the last day of the treatment, Saturday morning; when he started to cough up blood from his lungs, they took him down to ICU to clear out the blood, this all went well, but they kept him down there because he was starting to run a high fever. While this was all happening Aaron (my bro), mom and I were at Youth Quake for the weekend and getting these details about dad over the phone, we were a little worried about dad and wanted to go see him, but the doctors said that we shouldn't worry and that everything would be fine. During the night dad had a major stroke on his left side and he wasn't doing very good; we were all glad that we would be heading back to Saskatoon Sunday afternoon.
Mom had phoned Hilary (oldest sister) and Lindsay at school to tell them what was happening and that they should drive to Saskatoon right away. The next day my grandparents, Opa andthat's(thats Dutch for grandpa and grandma), arrived by plane and Aunt Tina and Uncle Keith picked them up from the airport. Pretty soon the whole family had arrived; we sat, prayed and waited and worried, talked with the doctors and knew that whatever happened next they could not prevent it, they could no longer help my father. We waited, prayed and talked amongst ourselves more. Some of my best friends came to help support and comfort; also to say goodbye to someone who had made such an impact on their lives as well. They all impacted me too, even though I haven't really realized it until now, but they have. Everyone could have saved themselves from the pain of seeing my father slowly decaying from the inside, they could have, but they decided that they wanted to be there, they wanted to say goodbye, even if he couldn't respond back.
I will always remember my dad as a strong man, in spirit, emotion, physique, and humour; definitely the humour. He was the joker of the family, the one who made as all laugh together, and unfortunately all cry together too. That Tuesday, March 2, 2005, at the age of fifty-one, my dad went to be with God. For some time I was angry with God for taking away someone who was so important in my life, someone that I still need so much. I wanted him to be there when I graduated or to walk me down the aisle when I had found that special someone, but this was never to happen, God's plans had changed all of that and it hurt me, it still does.
A few weeks after the funeral it hit me that even if dad died he was still here watching me making sure I did what was right or what I was supposed to do. I also realized that I still had a heavenly father too and that He would never leave me alone by myself, my fathers death was for a reason, for some great purpose and plan that God has in someone's life that really needed it, it my have been me, someone else in the family, or maybe a close friend, but it was not meaningless. Nothing is meaningless especially our love for God and my dad loved Him, even if it didn't show all the time even if he got mad occasion occassion, he loved him with everything he had, he served his whole life doing what God wanted him to do.
He loved God's creation which is probably why he loved farming so much, he was alone with Him, out in the open watching deer run across the fields, the growth of his crop, always amazed of how He always looked after him and his family (us). Everyday I drive by the fields when I'm driving alone into town to visit my friends and I can't help but wonder why dad loved what he did so much, but I have figured that out now, iamazementace, amazment, and his passion to serve the Lord the best way he could, he respected natures creations, and I'm sure he always felt bad when some unfortunate little animal dashed across the road in front of him.
Another passion he had were bees; he used to own a small bee yard just down the road where he would collect the honey and nectar, then bring to my uncle's honey farm, where he took a pail of honey home every two weeks. He loved the bees until he found he didn't have the time for them provide money to provid for our needs, so he sold them to my cousin who is working for my uncle and will soon be taking over the family business.
Then he got a new passion, trucking; he did this until the week he went into the hospital (which was amazing considering the condition his body was in). While he worked he met many new people, one was Kelly, his boss. They became good friends over the six or seven years that dad worked for him and when he was gone Kelly couldn't really believe it, they had become such good friends, dad would talk to him about God, but he really hadn't come to faith.
I believe that my dad died for a purpose and Kelly was one of them, he visited my dad and was amazed that he wasn't mad that he was sick, and when he saw us when dad was in IUC, he could see that we were worried and maybe some of us were mad, but yet we didn't blame it on God, instead we blamed it on the sin in the world for sin is the cause of death, but God's love and our faith and belief in Him is our life our eternal life, for we are not of this world. Kelly was impacted by our faith and he still carries that little seed that will one day flourish in his life, filling his soul will the love of Jesus and he will realize that this is what he was missing in his life, this is what he saw in each of us that day, God's love shining in us and our love for Him too.
Life is going on and only the thought that dad is face to face this his Saviour right now is what takes us through everyday with happiness and love, it is what keeps our faith, knowing that dad is no longer suffering in this world and is happy, pain free and probably talking with his father (grandpa, died of cancer when I was six) and his brother (Uncle Gordon, whom I never met, he died of leukemia when he was sixteen) and my cousin (Quenton, died from a farming accident when he was in grade nine), and they are all happy, living in a paradise that is beyond our wonders and imagination.
I pray everyday that dad would be my guardian angel, always watching over me and smile at all the good things that I do, frowning when I do something wrong and know it, laughing when I make a fool of myself, and crying with me when I'm sad, to comfort me when I need it most.
A few years ago, the summer of 2002, I was baptized at Bethel Gospel Camp during our churches Family Camp's. Being raised in a Christian home, I had no major problems, I hung out with my Christian friends, some of which are still really good friends with me, and there has been new additions along the way (not all of them Christian). I enjoyed going to Sunday school and I still do, and I have been going to camp since Teddy Bear (six or seven years old). Though I have slipped now and then in my faith, like many others, I have always had someone there that I could look to for help, to answer my many questions and to give me guidance, sometimes just by watching them practice their faith in everyday life. The past three years, since I was baptized, have been hard but I have been sticking with my faith by the help of all the people here and others from the church family.
Two summers after I was baptized I decided that I wanted to work here at camp with kids, so I took the CIT (Counsellors In Training) course (now called LITE (Leaders In Training and Evangelism)), and went hiking through the bush for three days with no accessories for cleaning. It was an amazing experience and continued to be so last year, when I was a Junior Counselor or JC.
Those of you who CITed with me will know that I had this problem with worrying, I worried a lot about someone in my family dying of cancer. When I was twelve my dad had gotten a form of cancer, the doctors had caught it in time though and in just a few months he was back home going in for scheduled check-ups for many years. I was worried and afraid that either the cancer would come back either, to dad or anyone else in my family, and that the doctors wouldn't catch it in time. One night while I was walking around outside thinking about this I went to Lindsay (my sister, second oldest) and told her my worries and fears. She just said these few words " Stop worrying, and start trusting that God will protect us, and if you start to worry again I want you to say this verse over and over again; 1 Peter 5:7 "Cast all your anxieties on Him because He cares for you." That helped me every time I started to worry about anything I would say it over and over again until I stopped worrying (I still do that).
After a few years past I had hardly ever thought about cancer coming back until this past spring when my dad once again fell victim to it, this time it was acute leukemia, one of the worst kinds, the doctors caught it in time but said it would take heavy chemo to cure dad. He went through his week of treatments, just fine nothing went horribly wrong until the last day of the treatment, Saturday morning; when he started to cough up blood from his lungs, they took him down to ICU to clear out the blood, this all went well, but they kept him down there because he was starting to run a high fever. While this was all happening Aaron (my bro), mom and I were at Youth Quake for the weekend and getting these details about dad over the phone, we were a little worried about dad and wanted to go see him, but the doctors said that we shouldn't worry and that everything would be fine. During the night dad had a major stroke on his left side and he wasn't doing very good; we were all glad that we would be heading back to Saskatoon Sunday afternoon.
Mom had phoned Hilary (oldest sister) and Lindsay at school to tell them what was happening and that they should drive to Saskatoon right away. The next day my grandparents, Opa andthat's(thats Dutch for grandpa and grandma), arrived by plane and Aunt Tina and Uncle Keith picked them up from the airport. Pretty soon the whole family had arrived; we sat, prayed and waited and worried, talked with the doctors and knew that whatever happened next they could not prevent it, they could no longer help my father. We waited, prayed and talked amongst ourselves more. Some of my best friends came to help support and comfort; also to say goodbye to someone who had made such an impact on their lives as well. They all impacted me too, even though I haven't really realized it until now, but they have. Everyone could have saved themselves from the pain of seeing my father slowly decaying from the inside, they could have, but they decided that they wanted to be there, they wanted to say goodbye, even if he couldn't respond back.
I will always remember my dad as a strong man, in spirit, emotion, physique, and humour; definitely the humour. He was the joker of the family, the one who made as all laugh together, and unfortunately all cry together too. That Tuesday, March 2, 2005, at the age of fifty-one, my dad went to be with God. For some time I was angry with God for taking away someone who was so important in my life, someone that I still need so much. I wanted him to be there when I graduated or to walk me down the aisle when I had found that special someone, but this was never to happen, God's plans had changed all of that and it hurt me, it still does.
A few weeks after the funeral it hit me that even if dad died he was still here watching me making sure I did what was right or what I was supposed to do. I also realized that I still had a heavenly father too and that He would never leave me alone by myself, my fathers death was for a reason, for some great purpose and plan that God has in someone's life that really needed it, it my have been me, someone else in the family, or maybe a close friend, but it was not meaningless. Nothing is meaningless especially our love for God and my dad loved Him, even if it didn't show all the time even if he got mad occasion occassion, he loved him with everything he had, he served his whole life doing what God wanted him to do.
He loved God's creation which is probably why he loved farming so much, he was alone with Him, out in the open watching deer run across the fields, the growth of his crop, always amazed of how He always looked after him and his family (us). Everyday I drive by the fields when I'm driving alone into town to visit my friends and I can't help but wonder why dad loved what he did so much, but I have figured that out now, iamazementace, amazment, and his passion to serve the Lord the best way he could, he respected natures creations, and I'm sure he always felt bad when some unfortunate little animal dashed across the road in front of him.
Another passion he had were bees; he used to own a small bee yard just down the road where he would collect the honey and nectar, then bring to my uncle's honey farm, where he took a pail of honey home every two weeks. He loved the bees until he found he didn't have the time for them provide money to provid for our needs, so he sold them to my cousin who is working for my uncle and will soon be taking over the family business.
Then he got a new passion, trucking; he did this until the week he went into the hospital (which was amazing considering the condition his body was in). While he worked he met many new people, one was Kelly, his boss. They became good friends over the six or seven years that dad worked for him and when he was gone Kelly couldn't really believe it, they had become such good friends, dad would talk to him about God, but he really hadn't come to faith.
I believe that my dad died for a purpose and Kelly was one of them, he visited my dad and was amazed that he wasn't mad that he was sick, and when he saw us when dad was in IUC, he could see that we were worried and maybe some of us were mad, but yet we didn't blame it on God, instead we blamed it on the sin in the world for sin is the cause of death, but God's love and our faith and belief in Him is our life our eternal life, for we are not of this world. Kelly was impacted by our faith and he still carries that little seed that will one day flourish in his life, filling his soul will the love of Jesus and he will realize that this is what he was missing in his life, this is what he saw in each of us that day, God's love shining in us and our love for Him too.
Life is going on and only the thought that dad is face to face this his Saviour right now is what takes us through everyday with happiness and love, it is what keeps our faith, knowing that dad is no longer suffering in this world and is happy, pain free and probably talking with his father (grandpa, died of cancer when I was six) and his brother (Uncle Gordon, whom I never met, he died of leukemia when he was sixteen) and my cousin (Quenton, died from a farming accident when he was in grade nine), and they are all happy, living in a paradise that is beyond our wonders and imagination.
I pray everyday that dad would be my guardian angel, always watching over me and smile at all the good things that I do, frowning when I do something wrong and know it, laughing when I make a fool of myself, and crying with me when I'm sad, to comfort me when I need it most.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)
